Funny vacation auto-replies for when you’re out-of-office!
So you’re going on vacation, right? You’ll be enjoying the beach or skiing the peaks of Mt. Expensive, without a care in the world… you’ll be away from it all, with or without your loved one in your Fortress of Solitude*! Eventually though, you will have to come back to work, remember? Most likely, you’ll open up Outlook to find a crowded Inbox full of clients demanding this-and-that and enquiring why their emails aren’t replied to (you will even see ALL CAPS!).
*I’m not judging here! 🙂
Because most of us encountered this headache, we have developed Auto reply Manager for Outlook, an add-in that lends a helping hand and lets you enjoy a few more days of peace when you get back to the office. Everyone will receive timely, specific auto-replies and will be that much happier! Since you probably need to send out auto-replies because you’re on vacation, let us buy you a drink by awarding you a $10-off coupon (so, a license for Auto reply Manager for Outlook will cost only $29.95, 30-day money-back guarantee). In order to benefit from this offer, just email us at email@example.com. You can also tailor rules so that only specific contacts receive your vacation auto-replies, while others get their emails forwarded or redirected to colleagues – just download a trial version from here and see how easy it is!
Now that you’ve got the proper tool for all your vacation auto-reply needs, why don’t you take a little time and compose a message that doesn’t sound like a robot wrote your auto-replies? The same-old “This is an auto-reply, I can’t be contacted – here, bother my secretary, maid, dog and grandma” just doesn’t cut it anymore… Are you going on the Moon, or what? With this in mind, you should stop trying to talk around the problem and compose something that really feels personal and to the point. This way, your vacation auto-reply will be read and the chances that you’ll actually be disturbed will decrease.
Take, for example this gem of an auto-reply, which I found over at Gizmodo: http://gizmodo.com/5836537/the-most-cleverest-vacation-auto+reply-e+mail-ive-seen?tag=email. Josh seems like fun, genuine person, right? All the while, he avoids irrelevant messages by making his senders think hard about the fact that they’re not only disturbing him, but his wife as well. The icing on the cake is the email address to which he will answer: Interruptyourvacation[at][deleted].com.
While you can always compose your vacation auto-reply like Josh, it’s funnier to create specific ones for all your groups. So, at least you won’t bother your friends with the business-talk! Here are a couple examples that you could use as inspiration and which I would love to see in someone’s auto-reply (however unlikely that may seem):
– Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
– I’m going to be out of Kansas from Sunday, August 2nd to Tuesday, August 11th. If you require urgent assistance, just double click on your ruby red mouse and tell yourself there’s no place like home. Dorothy [source]
– The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (the funny thing about this is that when you come back you can check and see who fell for it and how many times)
– Hi. I’m thinking about what you’ve just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response. (make fun of a friend with this one and see how long he/she waits until sending you another email, to which another auto-reply will be sent and so on…)
– Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management. (feels like Dilbert wrote this auto-reply, doesn’t it?)
– Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
– I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position.
– I’m out of office for the ritual slaughter of turkey and will have only occasional access to email. You have been warned. [source] (be sure to read the first comment as well, since it also contains a funny out-of-office auto reply)
Another great auto-reply example can be found in this funny New Yorker article: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/2010/10/25/101025sh_shouts_marks. If you read it in full, then you will surely get the irony of the thing (the sender is complaining that he doesn’t have the time to read more than 3 sentences, but sends you a page-long automated response). Taken from it, here’s an auto-reply in the form of a haiku:
I am busy now
The Internet has stolen
So much precious time.
Another thing to consider when dealing with auto-replies is that there are security issues. When composing one, don’t make a flowchart of the entire company’s email addresses and mobile/home phone numbers, since you don’t know who that info will be leaked to (disclaimer notice or not!). Another example of the misuse of auto-replies can be found here: http://www.warriorforum.com/main-internet-marketing-discussion-forum/199350-lol-funny-auto-reply-sly-ever-recieved-one-like.html, where someone uses a fake blog to enlist recipients to a dating service.
So, take a little time and write your own vacation auto-reply… we are all bored of the same-old business talk, so be a little creative! In the end, just make sure that you don’t wind up as Carol from this Dilbert strip.
Do you have anything to add? Have you received any funny auto-reply email that wasn’t on our list? Please leave your feedback, either in the Comments section or by email, to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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